The late night romantic comedy blares in the background with the usual plot line unfolding. A relationship falls apart. A job is lost. The lead is sick of their job, maybe even sick of their family. The woman meets her man. The list goes on and on. The main character often makes the decision to travel, to get away from the job, the man, or to go find the man out in the wilds of the world, far away from home.
While in Italy this summer, I often pondered the question, “Is travel an excuse?”. Amidst a language not my own, customs I didn’t uphold and that never ending feeling of not fitting in, travel as an excuse presented. Sure, you may travel to be changed. You may travel to learn a new language or understand a custom better. Others may travel to see sights they have always dreamed. That list, too, goes on and on, but there seems to be a catalyst that triggers it all, the “I’m going to travel because…” moment. The outsider at home wants to get away from those feelings of isolation. Your job quit you and traveling away from the humdrum 9 to 5 seems ideal. Your dream man or woman enters the picture, heading out to Egypt. Do you stay or go?
Travel For Socializing
I met other travelers this summer. Many were focused on the socializing of travel rather than the actual travel. They would want to stay out until 5 am, sleep all day and do it all again the next night. I think many of us were outsiders in high school, the ones no one picked in gym class. Travel has a way of making an outsider seem included. You travel around the world to lands that take you out of yourself. You don’t look like locals or dress as they do. You stand out. You find other outsiders in hostels that make you feel not so alone. Some people are welcoming to your outsider status while others are not. The social excuse quiets the outsider in all travelers. It might be the only place the outsider feels at home.
Travel For Job Escapism
Then, there seems to be the escape artist, the one that loses their job or the one that has a job. They leave it all to travel or it all leaves them so they travel. Behind those emotions, I often wonder what they find on the other end. When I was an au pair in Italy for all of three days, I decided to leave the job I hated and travel for a few months. Travel lends an emotion of comfort when your expectations for a job fall apart. I’ll hit the road, and it will all become clear. At least for me, it did. Unsatisfied with daily life and feelings of years are getting away may in fact lead the jobless or those with a job for the road. Travel yields a purpose when you feel you don’t have one in that cubicle.
Travel For The Man or Woman
Perhaps most in keeping with the romantic comedy plot line, some travelers end up jetting off for a man or woman. That dreamboat that you couldn’t find at home encourages you to head out to Turkey. You do despite having no plans to feast on Turkey. Perhaps tied to the social traveler, a connection is a connection no matter where you are. If you met your match, why not go where they go, right? I can’t relate to those that travel somewhere because their significant other does, but I do wonder how travel goals fare in the process. Suddenly the excuse is a person. It either works out beautifully or falls apart. Regardless, the lessons learned from travel for another, from what I see and hear, seem to be great nonetheless.
Where are we, honey?
We all travel for different reasons, but there is that wonder in me if we begin travel as an excuse for something else. Later, I think we realize what it is all about. Perhaps it isn’t an excuse, but just a step in the right direction, the windshield wiper moment where it is all clear. The loss of job, the bad job, the bad relationship, the bad friendships or lack there of may drive some to the road. If you need to know the ending, turn on a chic flick around 10PM. There is bound to be a character leaving something or someone to travel.
Do you think excuses are tied to deciding to travel? Does travel provide an answer to the bad job or relationship?
I can only say so much about this because I–personally–travel because it is what I love to do. I love being on the go, the unknown and all there is to learn from it.
The people that I see who travel for a separate reason don’t usually seem to be the nomadic type–travel may only be a means to an end and once said end is satisfied then so is their travel bug.
That is just a generalization, of course and it doesn’t necessarily make the travel any less legitimate. Maybe some people need a reason or “excuse” to justify their travel. Either way, the travel experience itself is what matters most.
A very cool look at things. There are many reasons to travel, but do those reasons constitute an excuse? Does one really need an excuse to do something? I kind of think people sometimes use the idea of an excuse to cover doing what they wanted to do anyway. I wasn’t going to travel, then X occurred so I just went and it was great. Although for others the excuse is a trigger; and once you are pushed off the edge of a cliff flapping your arms and trying to fly doesn’t hurt; as it might just work.
I love your first section about socializing. I was always picked last (or not at all) in High School. One of the things I say about the expat life is that I don’t fit in, but I’m not supposed to so it is ok.
While a breakup or job loss may be a small motivation for me to travel, it’s never my whole reason. In fact, travel is always on my mind, and if I undergo a period of life transition, it seems the perfect timing before life gets complicated or I become committed at home again. I never see it as a plan to get away and escape my real life.
As far as socializing, in some ways I am a different person abroad. I’m more open and willing to experience new people that I wouldn’t be drawn to at home.
I know what mean though about some travelers… I often wonder about the ones who just camp out in the same youth hostel, never really exploring or engaging with local culture for months on end. I met many like this in Africa, and I wondered if they were escaping something.
I’m not sure it’s so much of an excuse as the fact that travel provides distance from the familiar, and that distance provides perspective–the perspective we hope will help us see things more clearly. I’m not sure that’s an excuse or simply stepping back a bit to see the forest for the trees.
Interesting essay. Not sure I would call these reasons “excuses” since that seems like a loaded word. Travel may be a selfish act, but it’s also rewarding. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with treating yourself to a mental, relationship, career or spiritual break once in a while. Although I agree, I don’t see the point in traveling to faraway lands if you are just going to party with other foreigners in a hostel 24/7.
I think it’s more of an opportunity than an excuse. I know that I used a break-up and a uninspired job as motivation to leave. Sometimes a bad situation–or the potential of a better one–is exactly what we need to get us going!
“That dreamboat that you couldn’t find at home encourages you to head out to Turkey. You do despite having no plans to feast on Turkey.” -> Lol, love that line.
I use travel as a form of escape. It’s true.
Another blogger recently wrote that she never would have left the country had she not lost her job. I agree with her. I came to Australia after both a breakup and a layoff, and both things provided the impetus to finally get off my duff. But for years, pretty much since the end of college, I had wanted to move abroad. I had looked into it in various ways, but none of them seemed feasible or economical at the time.
I think some people–like myself, maybe–need to really have nothing to lose to give themselves that final push to go.
It’s an interesting question. I tend to feel that it’s impossible for anyone to classify someone else’s reason for traveling as every set of circumstances is obviously quite different. Even if we are not the type of person interested in partying our way across Europe or Southeast Asia, that might be exactly what the party-traveler we meet in the hostel needs at that point in their life.
The reasons for travel are endless and what may appear as an excuse to one person, may be an opportunity to another or a life-changing experience to someone else!
I travel because the demons inside my head tell me too.
Really great post. I have been traveling pretty much straight for 2 years now and am still looking for my reason. Or perhaps just still searching for the best sunset and best beer out there.
I’ve been pondering this one myself. I left home almost 4 years ago, and have jumped from one country to another, for work, love and stuyding, throughout this time. Now I find myself looking for a place to settle down, but I can’t help but to wonder if the grass is greener in the next country over. Maybe my next destination will be “it”?
These days I tend to think that travelling is like eating food. You can eat (travel) because you are hungry or because you are bored or because you are upset.
By the way, I’ve read a couple of your articles. I like your light-hearted philosophical style. And your quirky pictures.
I seek to travel for pure escapism. Not a shunning of responsibility or ‘reality’, more a motivation to see more, do more, experience more. Travel always has a way of making things clearer and putting everything into perspective.